If I’m your tumblr crush, send me $50.
when i was in kindergarten i had this babysitter who cooked the best steak i’d ever had and i’d always ask what it was and she said “people” every time and i’d laugh and ask what it really was and she’d just reply “people” and i found out in first grade that she got arrested and was sentenced to 50 years-life in prison
and that’s the story about how my babysitter was basically hannibal lecter and i was will graham for a whole year
if you sold all your eggs you would make $3.2 billion
your uterus is worth $3.2 billion
I JUST REALIZED THAT THIS MEANS EVERY TIME YOU HAVE A PERIOD YOU LOSE $8,000???????????? TERRIBLE
Maybe that’s why we get so emotional
did you just make an egg pun